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20110610

Self-Disclosure as Therapy

Writing about my life is therapeutic.

In my family of origin, I was deemed the problem child.

At the root of it was the shame my mother experienced when it was learned I was born with two birth defects. Much of this shame was due to her mother-in-law and my father, despite the fact that his brother was born with epilepsy and died of it.

In reaction to being shamed, my mother developed anxiety about it and passed that onto me. I recall being shamed by her, too. Also, my father used to shame me, too.

I remember one incident of being told by my father to straighten out my arms, and being made to feel as though it was abnormal not to have my right arm be straight.

In reporting this, by exposing this hurt to light, it will be impossible to feel ashamed for being born less than perfect.

For I know it to be true that no one thinks of himself as being perfect, for we are all human and prone to error.

Yet there is still room for spiritual healing to help me recover from the childhood years of neglect and abuse, and especially to remain forgiving towards my parents.

1 comment:

Sageb1 said...

One point I will emphasize is that child abuse and child neglect extends back so many generations.

It is irresponsible to continue blaming our parents, our grandparents and essentially our ancestors for such abuse without doing anything about the problem, lest it become an excuse for inaction.

Psychotherapy, especially cognitive behavior therapy is useful. So is maintaining a strong bond with a qualified psychotherapist.