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Turning Grape Juice into Wine (satire)

This is another Less is More idea.

Remember: making wine on your own is cheaper than buying from the store. Since you are making so little wine, it is unlikely you will poison yourself.

Besides, many fortified wines contain grain alcohol as do some sherries. YMMV

  • 2 cups of commercial Grape Juice
  • 1 teaspoon lemon juice (provides citric acid)
  • 1/4 teaspoon wine yeast
Utensils needed: enamel pan, teaspoon and tablespoon, optional electronic thermometer Instructions
  1. Pour grape juice in an enamel pan
  2. Heat to almost boiling
  3. On cooling to 98.6°F, add lemon juice and yeast
  4. Store in warm place and lightly cover with lid.
  5. Check often over the next six weeks.
Notes: For variety's sake, replace grape juice with blackcurrant syrup at 4 parts water to 1 parts juice e.g. 2 cups would contain a half cup of of syrup and 1.5 cups of water. Lemon juice is provided as acidifier. If you can afford it, then substitute with 1/4 teaspoon citric acid.
Disclaimer: this recipe is provided only for information purposes. The author takes no responsibility if anyone uses it to make their own alcohol equal to or greater than the recommended 2 cups.

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