20140813

The Old Fool and the Jar of Perfume (satire)

When this old fool focuses on mercy, love and forgiveness, that is no cause for alarm. Instead, it is a cause for joy.

Indeed, the world admires well the refreshing change in him, and encourages his new life. Yet this old fool never shall abandon the life of service offered to him.

Months ago as he listened to the pretty saleswoman give her priceless sales pitch before selling a jar of perfume to him, he realized his error in offering to buy it without listening to the woman.

Her story about the perfume only increased its worth when she was finished.

"Will you take fifty-five pieces of silver?" he asked. "I would offer more but that's all I have."

Instead of answering, the sales woman talked with her partner, who was just as pretty as her, saying, "He offers fifty-five but would offer more. What should we do?"

To which her partner replied, "I'll take it from here, Sarah."

"Of course, Diana, please do."

This old fool felt for his purse, and silver coins jingled in it. "Fifty-five is my only offer," said he with enthusiasm.

"The offer is fine, but we'd like to drop by to instruct you on the perfume's use."

"I know how to apply this perfume," replied the man. "It's like any other perfume, then?"

"No, this perfume has many different uses. If we let you go on your way without careful instructions, then you might end up smelling too pretty for the neighbours."

The man looked perturbed. "Is this a special perfume then?"

"You might say that it is. It's not like you could put a dab behind each ear and be done with it." Sarah smiled at the old fool.

"Ok, if it is a special perfume needing instruction while visited by you and your lovely friend, I'll pay now."

"That's ok," replied Sarah. "We'll instruct you on its use over several weeks to ensure it isn't wasted or misused. Then we'll take installments on your offer."

"Eh? This is new. You sold me on the perfume and now you want me to pay in installments? Are you trying to cheat me?"

"No," replied Diana. "After our instructions, you would be more than willing to pay by installments."

"Okay then," said the old fool. "I live at the foot of the hill near the meandering creek. It's a short jaunt from here. When's best for your arrival in a week, is it?"

"We'll be there in a week, and spend but an hour to instruct you on your perfume's use."

Over a period of two months, the two women instructed this old fool about the perfume. Then they took the first installment payment of a piece of silver. "Every month, we shall be back for payment, but shall continue to visit you weekly. However, let's now apply that perfume."

So they asked him to open the jar of perfume and he did. It had a mild rose-like smell. Instead of daubing his ear with a dollop of it, they daubed the soles of his feet.

"What kind of perfume is this that you rub it on the soles of my feet?" he asked them.

"You shall soon see," Diana replied, and looked at Sarah who said, "The soles of the feet are where this perfume works its magic."

Within minutes, this old fool felt calm and refreshed. "What sort of magic is this?"

Sarah said, "It's not really magic or trickery. This is a perfume that requires us to instruct you on its use. We anoint you with it, because of its special properties. Merely dabbing it behind your ears does nothing."

And this old fool just relaxed, and nodded. The perfume was doing its magic with him, for his calm and sedate mood left him happy and full of joy.

"We now leave you, sir!" they said in unison.


Each week, more instructions were given to the man by Diana and Sarah. A year later, he had paid off his fee for the jar of perfume, of which over half remained. So that must have been a big jar, indeed.

By then, this old fool had come to know and love both women like his daughters, if he was married. Yet being an old fool, he had chosen the virgin lifehood over marriage.

Three weeks into the new year, he was paid up but offered to buy a second jar of perfume. They accepted and more visits and instructions occurred. This old fool was a happy camper, for he had met with Diana and Sarah for over a year now, and they were now like family.

Eventually, this old fool discovered that the perfume had rejuvenating powers. His grey hair had vanished, and his memory was better than it was when he first met those saleswomen. So when they came to visit 23 weeks later, he made them a deal.

"I am so much enthralled by these jars of perfume that I want to learn to make them and sell them too."

To this, Diana said "We make this perfume with our father." Sarah added, "And we use special herbs and spices in its making."

"I promise to keep secret the formula," said the old fool.

"We'll ask our father," said both women.

A week later, they returned with 20 jars in a cart and their brother Joe. "We'll set up a kiosk with Joe's help."

Within two weeks, Joe had sold all the jars, and was also instructing ten customers. As years passed by this old fool became a rich man. He was beloved by all his customers, and Diana and Sarah decided to share the formula with him.

His batch of perfume was even better than the original, due to the special herbs he used in addition to the original formula. Not only were his customers rejuvenated but they also went on to sell his jars of perfume and also prospered. In due time, everyone was a happy camper, selling jars of perfume to more customers.

Diana and Sarah never objected to the change in the perfume's formula. It meant more profits for them too, because this old fool gave them 10% of his profits.

Ultimately, everyone became healthy and quick witted and lived a long life. They were also very rich, but always kindhearted and loving towards their neighbours and customers.

Here was a man who showed mercy, love and forgiveness did he prosper after meeting those pretty saleswomen, all due to the power of unconditional love.

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