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A Note to All Recipients from the Messenger (satire)

Attention to those people who might wish harm against me and are tempted to encourage others to silence me:

I encourage anyone who might have wished to murder me to consider the alternative: capture me and sell me to a black market organ extraction network for the top dollar my organs will provide you, up to a total of $5,000 or more!

By merely killing me, you only lose a lot more than you gain!

Please note that this is sarcasm at its darkest moments. The reason why my murder or its alternative will never happen is because you only hate what my words evoke in you, NOT ME.

For I am nothing when in your sight, and yet my words have evoked in you malice towards the messenger. You have only stopped there, and have ignored the root of your fears: that mass media has made us by selfish, manipulative people unable to acknowledge another if he dares to ignore us.

She and he who dare cast the first stones best be pure and innocent like a virgin, untouched for the first time. Anyone else will reap the fruits of his or her karma.

I swear that the writing of this article was made with no malice on my part.

What say you? >:)

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