Da'esh (A Haram) is Haram

An itinerant Muslim al-Khadim al-Nabil once told me:

One night I had a dream about the glorious missionaries Munkar and Nakir of the ancient kingdom of Ba'ed al-Haya.

Elders Munkar and Nakir greeted me, saying:

Peace be unto thee. We ask of thee three questions. Please carefully consider each question and answer righteously.

Who is the Lord!
Who is the Prophet?
What is thy faith about this person?

I replied, God, Mohammed, and Islam (submission to the Lord).

Glory to thee, said the esteemed elders. Please enter our glorious kingdom.

And they took me to Baed al-Haya in a heartbeat.

On arrival, Elder Munkar observed my face and asked:

Esteemed sir, thy countenance maketh thee unbecoming. Why art thou so melancholy?

To the blessed Elder, I said:

Where art the seventy-two virgins, most blessed Elder?

To which the glorious Elder replied:

Sir, thou hast been sorely misinformed.

I shall let my esteemed partner Nakir explain why.

To which the brilliant Elder Nakir chimed in:

Da'esh Haram.

Hash Brownies Dangers Overblown

The worst that could happen after overconsumption of hash brownies is you won't have enough $$ to pay what the hooker wants. Then you will wake up a day later, and slowly realize that you offered to pay your mom money for sex. Sometimes during the past 24 hours, you both were busted for miscellaneous drug charges i.e. the cops could smell all those brownies you ate. Oh, and you hallucinated the "I paid my mom for sex" part!

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Ok this is hyperbole. The imaginary 'you' I refer to is not the gentle reader.

My attempt to make eating hash brownies seem as awful as paying for sex is the combination of inadequate rest and the feeling that 420 day in Vancouver is getting too big for its locale.

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