Recently my friend/roommate Frank died.
Last week I had a dream where he came back to visit.
He was dressed in black. Most of the dream is fuzzy, but I believe we rode in a really nice car.
At the time I originally wrote this post, I had sunk into a depression over his death. It took me six years to get over his death and move on. The car in this dream is based on my memory of always being with Frank in his car.
Since Frank was a friend, this dream may have been telling me to make friends with myself i.e. to know myself better. The car represents my journey in life. The color black represents mourning. It also represents luxury and power. Overall, though, this dream was telling me to accept his death.
A later dream occurred a few years later. In it I was in a room with Frank at the far corner of the room. There were large boxes between us which made it hard to get to him.
The dream ended before I got to him.
This dream shows that at the time I still was not accepting Frank's death and moving on, since I was trying to get to him but had to negotiate through a maze of these boxes to him.
The boxes represent emotions and feelings that I was repressing. Frank being in the corner meant that I missed him.
The maze of boxes indicate that my journey in life is encountering difficulties due to not dealing with my emotions at the time.
Today, I barely remember my dreams, which is a good sign as it means I have come to terms with Frank's death and have learned to express my feelings more appropriately.
Originally posted: July 26, 2006 1631H
Updated: February 10, 2013 1303H
20060723
Marvelon and other birth control
With the side effects like low sex drive and what amounts to mood swings and brief psychotic episodes, I can understand why women stop taking pills.
Cos if you told your doc about them, he'd try to interest you in Paxil rather than working on the fact that BC pills do have bad side effects.
But BC is one of the side effects of having a healthy sex life.
If I were a woman, I'd give up on having one and just buy sex toys and batteries. :P
Cos if you told your doc about them, he'd try to interest you in Paxil rather than working on the fact that BC pills do have bad side effects.
But BC is one of the side effects of having a healthy sex life.
If I were a woman, I'd give up on having one and just buy sex toys and batteries. :P
20060719
Joy Arises
In the unthinkable, inscrutable, ordinary nature of reality there is no difference between freedom and bondage. No matter what arises, when you perceive your original nature, the joy arises automatically--and what joy!
-Shabkar, "The Flight Of The Garuda"
It is prudent to remain full of joy as much as possible.
Freedom and bondage should not determine nor be a condition of your joy.
Thus is it the intense focus of meditation on one single thing in one's life that help bring about this joy spontaneously.
This is the fruit of true mind control.
-Shabkar, "The Flight Of The Garuda"
It is prudent to remain full of joy as much as possible.
Freedom and bondage should not determine nor be a condition of your joy.
Thus is it the intense focus of meditation on one single thing in one's life that help bring about this joy spontaneously.
This is the fruit of true mind control.
Delight Arrives
Life continues to create itself and fall away, and suffering returns, and delight arrives, if even for a moment--agony, peace, rapture.
-Sandy Boucher, "Hidden Spring"
-Sandy Boucher, "Hidden Spring"
20060715
Compassion
Compassion makes one see the picture clearly; when emotions overtake us, the lack of seeing clearly clouds our perception of reality and hence the cause of many misunderstandings leading to quarrels (even wars). - the Dalai Lama
Direct realization and the spiritual journey
It is a defect in language that words suggest permanent realities and people do not see through this deception. But mere words cannot create reality. Thus people speak of a final goal and believe it is real, but it is a form of words and the goal as such is without substance. The one who realizes the emptiness of objects and concepts does not depend on words. Perfect wisdom is beyond definition, and pathlessness is the way to it.
The wise one treads this path for the direct realization of impermanence and for the direct realization of understanding. This, then, is perfect wisdom. Such a one should tread this path knowing that attachment and attractions are neither good nor harmful, even enlightenment is neither good nor harmful, because perfect wisdom is not meant to promote good or harm for that person. However, even though there is no intention of good or harm, it does confer endless blessing. — Prajnaparamita
Reality, not being permanent, thus cannot be accurately described by words.
In doing so, one paints a picture of reality.
Since reality is transient, how accurate is that picture a moment from now, let alone tomorrow? A year from now?
The sooner a person transcends reality to seek enlightenment, the better off she is.
Yet the best way to do so is to ground oneself in reality.
One only falls when one is suspended in the air.
Once you firmly plants your feet upon the ground, the journey of enlightenment begins.
The wise one treads this path for the direct realization of impermanence and for the direct realization of understanding. This, then, is perfect wisdom. Such a one should tread this path knowing that attachment and attractions are neither good nor harmful, even enlightenment is neither good nor harmful, because perfect wisdom is not meant to promote good or harm for that person. However, even though there is no intention of good or harm, it does confer endless blessing. — Prajnaparamita
Reality, not being permanent, thus cannot be accurately described by words.
In doing so, one paints a picture of reality.
Since reality is transient, how accurate is that picture a moment from now, let alone tomorrow? A year from now?
The sooner a person transcends reality to seek enlightenment, the better off she is.
Yet the best way to do so is to ground oneself in reality.
One only falls when one is suspended in the air.
Once you firmly plants your feet upon the ground, the journey of enlightenment begins.
Be restrained
Guard against anger
erupting in body;
in body, be restrained.
Having abandoned bodily misconduct,
live conducting yourself well
in body.
Guard against anger
erupting in speech;
in speech, be restrained.
Having abandoned verbal misconduct,
live conducting yourself well
in speech.
-Dhammapada, 17, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu.
erupting in body;
in body, be restrained.
Having abandoned bodily misconduct,
live conducting yourself well
in body.
Guard against anger
erupting in speech;
in speech, be restrained.
Having abandoned verbal misconduct,
live conducting yourself well
in speech.
-Dhammapada, 17, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu.
The Ultimate Pain-killer
If you are afraid of pain,
if you don't like it,
do nothing evil,
either openly or in secret.
For if you do,
even if you get up and run away
you won't escape its pain.
If you are afraid of pain,
if you don't like it,
take refuge in the Buddha,
the Dharma and the Sangha.
Train in the precepts.
This is good.
-Theri-Gatha, 246-249
In this context, "pain" refers to the psychic pain of suffering. It is called psychic because suffering affects the psyche i.e. the mind.
"Evil" refers to mental calculation to achieve short-term satisfaction by an ordinary mind.
"Do nothing evil" thus means to do everything that is good. It stands to reason to include all acts both openly and in secret.
When one does evil, running away will not allow one to escape the pain of suffering.
Since we are afraid of pain and do not like to suffer, taking refuge in the Three Treasures of Buddha, Dharma and Sangha is the solution.
By training in the precepts, the Buddhist is doing great good. His actions will neutralize the evil he has done.
if you don't like it,
do nothing evil,
either openly or in secret.
For if you do,
even if you get up and run away
you won't escape its pain.
If you are afraid of pain,
if you don't like it,
take refuge in the Buddha,
the Dharma and the Sangha.
Train in the precepts.
This is good.
-Theri-Gatha, 246-249
In this context, "pain" refers to the psychic pain of suffering. It is called psychic because suffering affects the psyche i.e. the mind.
"Evil" refers to mental calculation to achieve short-term satisfaction by an ordinary mind.
"Do nothing evil" thus means to do everything that is good. It stands to reason to include all acts both openly and in secret.
When one does evil, running away will not allow one to escape the pain of suffering.
Since we are afraid of pain and do not like to suffer, taking refuge in the Three Treasures of Buddha, Dharma and Sangha is the solution.
By training in the precepts, the Buddhist is doing great good. His actions will neutralize the evil he has done.
How to help the world
The more compassionate you are,
the more generous you can be.
The more generous you are,
the more loving-friendliness
you cultivate to help the world.
-Thich Nhat Hanh, "Buddhist Peacework"
Compassion begets generosity, and generosity, loving-friendliness. This friendliness once cultivated will help the world.
With compassion the motivation behind generosity, one can be generous in being more loving and more friendly towards other people.
In doing so, we help the world become a friendlier place.
the more generous you can be.
The more generous you are,
the more loving-friendliness
you cultivate to help the world.
-Thich Nhat Hanh, "Buddhist Peacework"
Compassion begets generosity, and generosity, loving-friendliness. This friendliness once cultivated will help the world.
With compassion the motivation behind generosity, one can be generous in being more loving and more friendly towards other people.
In doing so, we help the world become a friendlier place.
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