In a new relationship?
Check the closet. If the clothes hangers are deformed, then quite possibly the new partner has anger issues.
Do not confront her about the clothes hangers. Just know that your days with her are numbered.
While awaiting the end of the relationship, treat her respect and love. Forgive her plenty of times.
This is not the time to judge her since you really love her. Love her a lot. You know what to do.
Hopefully, by the time you two are this close, your love for each other is improving the relationship as well as each of you. It will help you to trust each other.
When the time is right to bring up the clothes hangers, and you'll know that is when you two start living together, go into her closet to put your clothes away on those hangers.
This is now when you ask "Darling, why are these hangers like this?"
If the relationship ends sometimes after this, the clothes hangers had absolutely nothing to do with it.
If, instead, you two grow closer in love, never forget the closet hangers, because if she can deform clothes hangers, then she can choke you to death when she lets her anger control her.
However, she won't ever do that to you because she loves you. So stop acting in any way to make her go bad-ass on you.
Should you be one of those empaths, narcissists or sociopaths you would not have made it this far. Her anger issues were because of your behavior, be it emotional overreactions, selfishness or abuse. If she were on the ball, then she would have kicked you out a long time ago.
Deal with it and move on.
Showing posts with label anger management. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anger management. Show all posts
20120223
Amy Winehouse: Could Anger Be Root of Her Untimely Death?
Although I've read that Amy Winehouse's Frank album was her best work, I never bought it; I got the Back to Black album, in which she cashes in on her notoriety.
My theory about her death is that her mum and dad had lost her when they divorced.
It broke her heart.
It was just a question of time before the issues that the breakup caused would become toxic.
Plus, she'd revealed warning signs after Frank i.e. she didn't like it, mainly cos she felt like she was manufacturing product for the label.
Also, her management team were not always looking out for her best interest.
Their reaction to the UN drug czar's comment a few years ago cinched that.
The lady made unwise choices because of anger issues stemming from her parents' divorce which she refused to get help for, even when offered help.
My theory about her death is that her mum and dad had lost her when they divorced.
It broke her heart.
It was just a question of time before the issues that the breakup caused would become toxic.
Plus, she'd revealed warning signs after Frank i.e. she didn't like it, mainly cos she felt like she was manufacturing product for the label.
Also, her management team were not always looking out for her best interest.
Their reaction to the UN drug czar's comment a few years ago cinched that.
The lady made unwise choices because of anger issues stemming from her parents' divorce which she refused to get help for, even when offered help.
20110506
Buddhism and Anger: Three Types of People
The Buddha said:
"There are three types of people in the world. What three?
One who is like carving on a rock, one who is like scratching on the ground and one who is like writing on the water.
What sort of person is like carving on the rock?
Imagine a certain person who is always getting angry and his anger lasts long, jut as carving on a rock is not soon worn off by wind, water or lapse of time.
What sort of person is like scratching on the ground?
Imagine a certain person who is always getting angry but his anger does not last long, just as scratching on the ground is soon worn off by wind, water and lapse of time.
And what sort of person is like writing on the water?
Imagine a certain person who, even though spoken to harshly, sharply, roughly, is easily reconciled and becomes agreeable and friendly, just as writing on the water soon disappears".
--Anguttara Nikaya I/283
Reflection on these three types of people forms the basis for the Buddhist approach to anger management.
This is helpful in putting anger in context of the situation in which it arises.
This part of Anguttara Nikaya is known to be part of the Book of Threes (Tika Nipata), called in Pali, Lekha Sutta. However, this translation is also popular in Singapore and Sri Lanka.
Reference:
Anger Management Buddhist style: http://www.4ui.com/eart/178eart1.htm
Anger in context: http://www.burnfield.net/id14.htm
Anguttara Nikaya:
Tika Nipata: http://www.suttacentral.net/disp_sutta.php?subdivision_id=61&subdivision_name=Tika%20Nip%C4%81ta&collection_name=Pali&division=AN&acronym=3&type=Subdivision
Singapore:
There are three types of people: http://sdhammika.blogspot.ca/2010/03/there-are-three-types-of-people-in.html
Essential teachings of the Buddha: http://www.alexkhun.com/drupal79/node/68
Sri Lanka
Syndrome of hate: http://www.lankika.com/?p=7451
"There are three types of people in the world. What three?
One who is like carving on a rock, one who is like scratching on the ground and one who is like writing on the water.
What sort of person is like carving on the rock?
Imagine a certain person who is always getting angry and his anger lasts long, jut as carving on a rock is not soon worn off by wind, water or lapse of time.
What sort of person is like scratching on the ground?
Imagine a certain person who is always getting angry but his anger does not last long, just as scratching on the ground is soon worn off by wind, water and lapse of time.
And what sort of person is like writing on the water?
Imagine a certain person who, even though spoken to harshly, sharply, roughly, is easily reconciled and becomes agreeable and friendly, just as writing on the water soon disappears".
--Anguttara Nikaya I/283
Reflection on these three types of people forms the basis for the Buddhist approach to anger management.
This is helpful in putting anger in context of the situation in which it arises.
This part of Anguttara Nikaya is known to be part of the Book of Threes (Tika Nipata), called in Pali, Lekha Sutta. However, this translation is also popular in Singapore and Sri Lanka.
Reference:
Anger Management Buddhist style: http://www.4ui.com/eart/178eart1.htm
Anger in context: http://www.burnfield.net/id14.htm
Anguttara Nikaya:
Tika Nipata: http://www.suttacentral.net/disp_sutta.php?subdivision_id=61&subdivision_name=Tika%20Nip%C4%81ta&collection_name=Pali&division=AN&acronym=3&type=Subdivision
Singapore:
There are three types of people: http://sdhammika.blogspot.ca/2010/03/there-are-three-types-of-people-in.html
Essential teachings of the Buddha: http://www.alexkhun.com/drupal79/node/68
Sri Lanka
Syndrome of hate: http://www.lankika.com/?p=7451
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