Buddhists Neither Good Nor Evil

In Buddhism, not one person is a good Buddhist, nor is anyone a bad Buddhist. Rather, a person may have used skillful or unskillful means, and the karmic fruit of her actions have ripened in many interesting ways.

All karma is to the Buddhist action which bears fruit according to her skills.

When an action is done with right intentions, and no harm immediately arises, that action has sown the skillful karmic fruit of no immediate result.

When an action is done with wrong intentions, and harm immediately arises, that action has sown the unskillful karmic fruit immediate result.

When an action is done with right intentions, and harm immediately arises that action has sown
no karmic fruit, but instead a previous unskillful karmic action has born fruit.

When an action is done with wrong intentions, and no harm arises, the karmic fruit of a previous action arose to delay the unskillful karmic fruit to ripen at a later time.


However, the ideal of a good Buddhist violates the non-self principle, since it is assumed that a "good Buddhist" always is good. The truth is, if he is skillful, a Buddhist creates good by mindful practice, and by following the precepts.

He seeks neither fame nor glory, lest it distract him from fulfilling the twofold aims of the Bodhi Mind: determination to save all sentient beings, and the aspiration for Buddhahood.

Should he be unskillful, it cannot be assumed that his destiny be the Hells, since previous karmic merit
also affect the results of actions taken currently. Neither can it be assumed that his destinies is to be any one of the Three Relams (Desire, Form and Formless Realms).

Jealousy and the Buddhist Approach to Managing It

In this article, I am referring to cases where the jealousy has lead to breakups, and the woman wishes to stop the pattern because it is affecting her happiness.

As well, I am not giving advice; rather, what is written here serves only as a guide. For it is not relationship advice at all.

I do not take responsibility when anything written here is misused.

YMMV.


When I make a statement like "I feel that this person is jealous because ...", it is never made as a judgment call.

Rather, I am specifically pointing out an unskillful action which may bear karmic fruit one day, or many lifetimes later, depending on whether the person turned about, and vowed to manage her jealous feelings responsibly or decided that "jealousy is a normal human emotion which does not need changing."

Just because an emotion, feeling or mood is "normal" does not imply it is good to display.

If anyone wishing to put their mind to it, then they can manage feelings of jealousy with patience and love.

For example, if a woman felt that their boyfriend is spending too much time with a female co-worker, then she may experience jealousy. However, should she decide to use unskillful means such as harassing her at work or at home, and telling her boyfriend to not spend so much time with her to the point of argument, then she will only be causing further woe for herself.

If her boyfriend gets angry with her, and they break up, then she might decide to get even with the woman she is jealous of, rather than doing the mature thing, which is to talk things over with her boyfriend. On further discussion with him, she may be able to reconcile with him or decide that the relationship is over.

While I do not know why a woman gets jealous with another woman, I do know that the other woman usually is not the problem. Rather, jealousy indicates that one may a problem with anger and desire.

Rather than displaying aggression towards the person a woman is jealous of, it is skillful to exercise patience and display love towards her partner. Then when the time is ripe, the woman may talk with the coworker of her partner during a social gathering to see if the other woman has romantic intentions.

---

Reference:

Strategies forResolving Jealousy: http://www.berzinarchives.com/web/x/nav/group.html_218817758.html

Skillful and Unskillful Means

In Buddhism, calmness of body and mind is an effect of skillful means. Indeed, it is most excellent to be calm.

Why? Because the main practice to achieve calmness of body and mind is meditation, particularly the shamatha practice. Thus meditation is a skillful means to help settle the mind.

As for the definition of "skillful' we first begin with the Budhist term in Pali, "kusala", which is often mistranslated as "good":

1. Firm: resolute, stable, unmoving, undistracted.
   
2. Pure and clean: unstained, immaculate, bright.
   
3. Clear and free: unrestricted, free, exalted, boundless.
   
4. Fit for work: pliant, light, fluent, patient.
   
5. Calm and content: relaxed, serene, satisfied.

Contrasting with "kusala" is "akusala", which means "unskillful", and its definitions are:

1. Infirm: irresolute, unstable, immovable, distracted, still.
   
2. Impure and unclean: stained, dirty, dull.
   
3. Unclear and unfree: restricted, unfree, debased, limited.
   
4. Unfit for work: unbendable, heavy, stuttering, impatient.
   
5. Agitated and unsatisfied: anxious, wrathful, unsatisfied.
   

Think of all the activities which lead to an unsettled mind, and those actions will be unskillful means. This may include bullying, catcalling, desire, emotive, fear, gossiping, hatred, ignorance that lead to delusion (mistaking hallucinations for reality, ignoring reality), etc. Currently in the West, most people are unaware that meditation extends beyond its tranquilizing effects. Of course, sleep is not the effect of meditation, but is due to slothfulness and torpor. It indicates the workings of the ego in its attempt to distract the devotee from meditating. Boredom may be associated with slothfulness, but in Western society, it is not considered an "evil". Through insight meditation (vipashyana, vipassana), it is possible to notice the difference between skillful and unskillful means, and why skillful means is good and unskillful means is "evil".

---

Reference:

Good and Evil in Buddhism: http://buddhism.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=buddhism&cdn=religion&tm=67&f=10&su=p284.13.342.ip_&tt=2&bt=0&bts=0&zu=http%3A//www.urbandharma.org/udharma5/goodevil.html

How to Master Fear

The cause of all fear is self-grasping ignorance, and all the delusions, such as selfishness, attachment and anger, arise from that ignorance, as well as all the unskillful actions motivated by those delusions. --From Tharpa.com

Thus, the antidotes to the delusions of selfishness, attachment and anger are
selflessness, detachment and unconditional love.

Selflessness is best achieved by helping people without expecting reward, to give of ourselves without thought of being a giver.

Detachment is known as letting go, i.e. to not hold onto something as though it were near and dear to you, even when this turns out to be your own life.

Yet to throw away your life needlessly is not detachment, but foolhardiness.

With a healthy sense of detachment, one learns to balance self-preservation with self sacrifice.

Unconditional love is also known as compassion, the kind of love which makes no exceptions, such that one may love another, regardless of whether s/he is friend or enemy.

It may be that selflessness, detachment and unconditional love are the greatest tools a person may develop to remove all delusions, and even ignorance itself.

And no one is excluded from developing their skills in use of these tools.

Yet, only the good of us continue to use them to benefit us all.