My best friend was FM. After hearing how he grew up in Surrey as a kid, I realized that child abuse is also the prime factor in alcoholism and drug abuse.
However, the rest of this blog post isn't about him but is chiefly concerned with the prevalence of child abuse in the addiction and mental health field.
Due to the fact that no health professional can handle trauma without getting tripped up by its intensity, child abuse sometimes overlooked by mental health professionals.
As well, I learned that child abuse and neglect is sometimes swept under the rug by health professionals because of the costs in burnout due to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder induced by detailed revelations of the abuse.
Victims of child abuse or neglect are given a limited (PTSD) time in psychotherapy (2 years) because therapy does not work with personality disorders caused by PTSD from the abuse.
However, any health professional who reacts negatively to a person hurting from child abuse, even though both parents are dead, acts in an unprofessional manner when that mental health consumer is told to "get over it."
When a person chooses to live in her own hell, the challenge is in offering her choices that show to her the futility of living in hell.
A lack of belief in heaven and a God that is forgiving is lost on child abuse victims whose father used to abuse them as children because the only father they knew was mean to them.
Religion is also lost on them when the abuse was done by a certain Christian sect. Such Christian sects attract child abusers and other sinners who break Jesus' rule against harming children, because it is so easy to control the church hierarchy by invoking the name of the Devil or Satan to prevent exposure of the crime.
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
20121223
Myopic Thoughts on Male Prostitution
If the gentle reader has any objection to what I've written, then feel free to do one of the following: 1) comment, provided you have a Gmail account, 2) get a Google Plus account to discuss your objection, or 3) link me via Google Plus or, if you place my link on your website or a third-party page, then leave a comment so I can thank you. You are free to talk behind my back, provided that if I find out , that you engage in civil discussion when I defend myself.
Feminism has led to me wishing I'd been born female, but that's unrealistic.
However, it is homophobic to call a straight male gay if he expresses such a wish when his desire to become female is tempered by reality and motivated by egalitarian ideals rather than the patriarchy that claims to foster equality of gender rights yet condones sexism by both sides of the gender debate.
At the moment, the choices to get out a bad situation a woman has are exceedingly greater than for a man in the same position when at risk.
For example, a female prostitute can get pregnant or get married to avoid the situation. If a bad trick is after her, she can escape to a women's shelter. If she has a drug addiction, there's rehab. As well, she can delay prostitution to a later age than men. She is at risk for victimization by rape and murder.
A male prostitute has to avoid gay bashing, sodomy (rape) and murder. He also has to wait until 18 before seeking to get out of the business, because he could end up being taken from one home and placed in another, rather than actually have the core issue that he may share with his sister of the night: threat of physical and/or sexual abuse in the home he lives in. If that threat is absent there, then there may be an abuser awaiting in the immediate community.
I feel that social workers need to step up the scrutiny of foster homes, to prevent abuse. The kinds of foster parents which ought to be closely scrutinized are where one or both parent has an untreated mental illness, untreated drug addiction, or both untreated mental illness and drug addiction.
These problems cannot be properly treated if the minor is treated to the chaos involved in fostering, as sometimes it leads to unsafe environments even though the foster care system says otherwise.
This is why male prostitutes wait longer before exiting prostitution.
Sometimes a male prostitute will have been oppressed by a family member physically and/or sexually. If discovered by the State, then it leads to the chaos of foster care. If not discovered, then it could lead to at-risk behavior such as suicide by either the fast route (hanging, poisoning, slitting wrists, gun) or the slow route (drug addiction including alcohol and tobacco, abuse of pharmaceutical drugs particularly narcotics, cutting and similar forms of self abuse including the psychological).
It is important for the State's agents (social workers) never use any method available to them to play the blame game with the parents. However, the parents' objections to removal of their child still need to be included in the court evidence when a male prostitute who is a minor is taken away from his birth parents and inserted into a foster home. In no way is the State to allow homophobia to guide its hand in this matter. Thus, the State has no say at all in sexuality of its charges in a foster or group home.
The same recommendations above also apply to group homes, and this includes regular training of security guards who ha to put up with psychotic children who have been abused from a young age.
Feminism has led to me wishing I'd been born female, but that's unrealistic.
However, it is homophobic to call a straight male gay if he expresses such a wish when his desire to become female is tempered by reality and motivated by egalitarian ideals rather than the patriarchy that claims to foster equality of gender rights yet condones sexism by both sides of the gender debate.
At the moment, the choices to get out a bad situation a woman has are exceedingly greater than for a man in the same position when at risk.
For example, a female prostitute can get pregnant or get married to avoid the situation. If a bad trick is after her, she can escape to a women's shelter. If she has a drug addiction, there's rehab. As well, she can delay prostitution to a later age than men. She is at risk for victimization by rape and murder.
A male prostitute has to avoid gay bashing, sodomy (rape) and murder. He also has to wait until 18 before seeking to get out of the business, because he could end up being taken from one home and placed in another, rather than actually have the core issue that he may share with his sister of the night: threat of physical and/or sexual abuse in the home he lives in. If that threat is absent there, then there may be an abuser awaiting in the immediate community.
I feel that social workers need to step up the scrutiny of foster homes, to prevent abuse. The kinds of foster parents which ought to be closely scrutinized are where one or both parent has an untreated mental illness, untreated drug addiction, or both untreated mental illness and drug addiction.
These problems cannot be properly treated if the minor is treated to the chaos involved in fostering, as sometimes it leads to unsafe environments even though the foster care system says otherwise.
This is why male prostitutes wait longer before exiting prostitution.
Sometimes a male prostitute will have been oppressed by a family member physically and/or sexually. If discovered by the State, then it leads to the chaos of foster care. If not discovered, then it could lead to at-risk behavior such as suicide by either the fast route (hanging, poisoning, slitting wrists, gun) or the slow route (drug addiction including alcohol and tobacco, abuse of pharmaceutical drugs particularly narcotics, cutting and similar forms of self abuse including the psychological).
It is important for the State's agents (social workers) never use any method available to them to play the blame game with the parents. However, the parents' objections to removal of their child still need to be included in the court evidence when a male prostitute who is a minor is taken away from his birth parents and inserted into a foster home. In no way is the State to allow homophobia to guide its hand in this matter. Thus, the State has no say at all in sexuality of its charges in a foster or group home.
The same recommendations above also apply to group homes, and this includes regular training of security guards who ha to put up with psychotic children who have been abused from a young age.
Ethnic Solidarity in Fostering
Nothing in this blog entry is expert opinion but is based on observation of the effects of foster families. Hence it is biased and needs a rewrite. So if after you read this article and object to anything I recommend or say, then I urge you to comment to me.
It's not to hard to get a Gmail account and to become a GooglePlus member when that restricts comments. However, I am not a firm believer in perpetuating the evils of open comments, because the goods of rational discussion are not supported by the evils of spamming, and darkly negative comments which stop discussion dead.
Essentially, the family's cohesiveness ought never be challenged by the State. For the consequences of State involvement in the break-up of family are worse than the immediate situation IF and only IF the family is so dysfunctional that the children's security and safety are at threat.
During the interview to become a foster parent, it is up to the social worker to get a complete picture of the foster parents, his or her parents, and how everyone grew up. This thus will involve family therapists, and other mental health professionals. As it stands now, the gaping holes in the process leading up to being a foster parent need to be repaired.
Making these statements about foster parenting is in no way 'attacking' good foster parents. It is merely asking of social workers to enhance the security of family and the security of fostering. If this is actually done now, and my words are not in touch with today, then my words only show that I expect the process to continue to weed out "bad" parents.
One warning sign of "bad" parenting is when the social worker asks the question, "How are things going on in the home?" and there is an awkward silence followed by "Fine", "Things are alright and Sally is doing well", and "I really like it here. Thanks." Yet the foster parents and the foster child assigned to the home are not making eye contact with the workers.
If this is an Asian family with an Asian children, then the cultural trait of deference should be assumed. If they were suspected of having problems, then it's important to then say, "Well, off the record, are there problem between you, Joe and you, Jane?" and then after a minute, "How about you, Sally?" Finally, individual interviews need to be taken to help avoid the tendency for family groups to "put the lid on rotten garbage".
I actually encourage ethnic solidarity to be the practice of social workers. A lot of the problems in foster families is that the cultural milieu of the foster home may be at odds with the culture in which the child grew up. When the child is between 12 and 18, cultural traits are already hardwired and therefore, there will always be confrontation between the foster parents and the child being fostered. Therefore it is recommended that the child be matched by cultural origin, before other criteria are added to ensure fostering avoids the pitfall of any underlying agenda to continue the cycle of patriarchy.
Ethnic solidarity implies that both the child's cultural traits and the foster parents' traits match. When they do not match, then the foster parents are disqualified. Thus the home must be Asian if the child is Asian. However, the parents may be Asian or non-Asians who have adopted most of the Asian cultural traits through assimilation in an Asian community or country. This is not a racialist priotity; this is a multicultural priority.
Objection to this ethnic solidarity may be that any family is good enough to the child when his or her needs are met. I would argue that without a good ethnic match, the foster parents will rarely get the foster child from observing their family rules when the child has had a relax set of rules made arbitarily.
If you want confirmation of that, check out The World's Strictest Parents on Youtube.
It's not to hard to get a Gmail account and to become a GooglePlus member when that restricts comments. However, I am not a firm believer in perpetuating the evils of open comments, because the goods of rational discussion are not supported by the evils of spamming, and darkly negative comments which stop discussion dead.
Essentially, the family's cohesiveness ought never be challenged by the State. For the consequences of State involvement in the break-up of family are worse than the immediate situation IF and only IF the family is so dysfunctional that the children's security and safety are at threat.
During the interview to become a foster parent, it is up to the social worker to get a complete picture of the foster parents, his or her parents, and how everyone grew up. This thus will involve family therapists, and other mental health professionals. As it stands now, the gaping holes in the process leading up to being a foster parent need to be repaired.
Making these statements about foster parenting is in no way 'attacking' good foster parents. It is merely asking of social workers to enhance the security of family and the security of fostering. If this is actually done now, and my words are not in touch with today, then my words only show that I expect the process to continue to weed out "bad" parents.
One warning sign of "bad" parenting is when the social worker asks the question, "How are things going on in the home?" and there is an awkward silence followed by "Fine", "Things are alright and Sally is doing well", and "I really like it here. Thanks." Yet the foster parents and the foster child assigned to the home are not making eye contact with the workers.
If this is an Asian family with an Asian children, then the cultural trait of deference should be assumed. If they were suspected of having problems, then it's important to then say, "Well, off the record, are there problem between you, Joe and you, Jane?" and then after a minute, "How about you, Sally?" Finally, individual interviews need to be taken to help avoid the tendency for family groups to "put the lid on rotten garbage".
I actually encourage ethnic solidarity to be the practice of social workers. A lot of the problems in foster families is that the cultural milieu of the foster home may be at odds with the culture in which the child grew up. When the child is between 12 and 18, cultural traits are already hardwired and therefore, there will always be confrontation between the foster parents and the child being fostered. Therefore it is recommended that the child be matched by cultural origin, before other criteria are added to ensure fostering avoids the pitfall of any underlying agenda to continue the cycle of patriarchy.
Ethnic solidarity implies that both the child's cultural traits and the foster parents' traits match. When they do not match, then the foster parents are disqualified. Thus the home must be Asian if the child is Asian. However, the parents may be Asian or non-Asians who have adopted most of the Asian cultural traits through assimilation in an Asian community or country. This is not a racialist priotity; this is a multicultural priority.
Objection to this ethnic solidarity may be that any family is good enough to the child when his or her needs are met. I would argue that without a good ethnic match, the foster parents will rarely get the foster child from observing their family rules when the child has had a relax set of rules made arbitarily.
If you want confirmation of that, check out The World's Strictest Parents on Youtube.
20121130
Hasidic Jewess Fights Back
On Google Plus, this Jewish women led me to find out that this alone is her battle.
"Though the young woman’s parents had asked her to drop the case as recently as this spring, the victim testified, about 20 members of her family came to show their support in court."
I am certain that her husband supported her decision to help bring closure.
It is a touching story, and one that most people would like to ignore, just as the Hasidic community does to anyone who reports such things to outsiders.
While I do not have a problem with Hasidism, its rules promote social isolation which makes it a ripe hunting ground for sexual predators within the community, as well as increasing the risk for depression due to its rules imposed on the community.
Thankfully, because this young 18-year-old woman is female, there is a ground swell of support both inside and outside the Jewish community.
Hopefully the next male victim of a reb who is a pedophile will come forward, and the advocates against child abuse will rally to his cause, too.
"Though the young woman’s parents had asked her to drop the case as recently as this spring, the victim testified, about 20 members of her family came to show their support in court."
I am certain that her husband supported her decision to help bring closure.
It is a touching story, and one that most people would like to ignore, just as the Hasidic community does to anyone who reports such things to outsiders.
While I do not have a problem with Hasidism, its rules promote social isolation which makes it a ripe hunting ground for sexual predators within the community, as well as increasing the risk for depression due to its rules imposed on the community.
Thankfully, because this young 18-year-old woman is female, there is a ground swell of support both inside and outside the Jewish community.
Hopefully the next male victim of a reb who is a pedophile will come forward, and the advocates against child abuse will rally to his cause, too.
20121125
State Abuse Leads to Suicide
Anna Caroline Jennings (1960 - 1992)
Anna Jennings was sexually abused when she was less than three years old. This was the first of several abuses that occurred over her lifetime, and put a confused, frightened child into a mental health system that neither recognized nor treated Anna's real problem. Diagnosed 'schizophrenic'.. she was institutionalized for more than 12 years from age 15 to 32. Although she attempted to communicate the 'awful things' that had happened to her, there was no one to listen, understand or help her. She took her life on October 24, 1992, on a back ward of a state mental hospital.
PTSD due to sexual abuse may look similar to "schizophrenic" symptoms, but the labeling is used by the authorities to pretend the abuse never occurred.
This is similar to Freud's rewrite of his "women's psychiatric disorders are due to incest" into the psychoanalytic theory co-opted by the State.
In a sense, psychoanalysis is a form of patient abuse. This is why it has the worst record for "cures" and lots of case histories of relapse and possible further victimization of clients of psychoanalysts.
As it stands today, the effective therapies accept life history as real to the patient, but do not address the history directly. Rather, the patients are given coping skills and strategies to do a continuing self-assessment on their own.
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