Conquering passion (poem)

Think of passion (kama)
as the source of the dust
on the mirror or the fog
on the window of the soul.

By just sitting,
wake the rational mind
from its slumber
and control the heart.

By just sitting,
blow away the dust
on the mirror,
and wipe away the fog
on the window.

When passion is quenched,
all that is left is bliss.

True Love is Unconditional Love (poem)

True love transcends all bounds
when both parties make the effort
to move beyond desire
and all that is human.
To merely indulge
in human love is to restrict
oneself to suffering.
In transcending desire,
unconditional love becomes
the source to help
cross over to the divine.

Get to know others (poem)

Though life is full of suffering,
the ideal way to develop compassion
is to transcend human love,
and share unconditional love
with another sentient being.
Knowing myself very well,
when I get to know others,
I share unconditional love.
Even when I fear being hurt,
by getting to know someone
I am developing compassion.
In sharing our lives,
we treasure each other
as true friends forever.

Alive in this heart

Alive in this heart is
unconditional love, though
each moment lingers,
sometimes pain, sometimes pleasure...
Yet love soothes pain and brings joy.

The myth of Jesus as miracle worker

One of his followers urged the Buddha to perform a miracle in order to attract some non-believers. The Buddha replied:

"I detest and will not undertake the so-called miracles of magic power and divination. I and my followers attract non-believers only by the miracle of truth."

-Digha Nikaya

Thus a holy man does not have to prove his holiness by being a miracle worker.

That Jesus was purported to do miracles then cannot be verified as truth but as anecdote.

Udon!

First, gyoza;
then udon.
That's a meal!

First udon;
then sakë.
That's heaven on earth!

First green tea;
then udon.
That's so peaceful!

All people are essentially good

From birth all people are essentially good. Environment determines the majority of factors which both help and hinder them. Genetics only accounts for a minority of such factors.

Thus Life is about choices.

When necessary, people may choose to act, and to not act .

For the good among us choose to act and think for the good, while the evil fail to act, let alone contemplate doing good.

Although environment shapes such decisions, today they may be aligned with society, only to be at odds with the world tomorrow .

Without effort the average person will eventually follow a cycle of positive and negative self-talk in her daily routine. Whether positive or negative, this self-talk is influenced by personality and the preference of the person.

One critical factor is the influence of fatigue on the state of mind of the individual. A tired person may tend to become easily agitated, anxious to the point of obsession with the counter-thrust of compulsion.

Not a pretty picture, as far as mental stability goes!

As a result of such agitation when tired she might increasingly prefer negative self-talk to express her feelings and state of mind overall.

Sometimes insomnia may embrace her, leading to temporary mania with increased appetite for stimulus, be it through food, sex or thought.

Of course, the risk of obsession with negative ideation is always there, as with positive ideation — sometimes with attendant optimism.

All of this is positive without the use of psychotropic drugs.

With meditation and cognitive training the patient learns how to visualize positive behavior.

She reduces the negative action of stress in life in favor of effective strategies which promote such behavior.

In doing so, she gains control of her life.

Deep Hearing Practice

Listening with the heart takes a lifetime to learn, and the dedication to actively practice deep hearing with heartfelt honesty tempered with tact.

It requires going beyond merely listening with the ears.

For the deep listener listens with the heart.

Dance Away

Dance away my ills,
and all my sorrows vanish,
forgotten for now.
He who chooses to be good
had better tread wisely.

When there is sorrow,
dance for the return of joy.
When there is anger,
dance calmly. In this way,
I forget all of the pain.

Dancing is meditation
to this foolish man.
When he dances he forgets
himself and becomes
the humble dancer of joy.

Soothing the Inner Child

Why do I listen
to the voice of habit,
the child's naive cry
that this is the only way?
I let go of childhood now.

I know this inner voice well:
the inner child, Fear
and her playmate, Anger. O!
That inner voice fades
with growing self confidence.

I only listen
to the voice of reason,
soothing all my pain
with unconditional love,
wiping all my tears away.

Summer Solstice

briefly this morning
the sun's gaze pierces the clouds,
with time standing still

solstice summer

by late afternoon
a cloudy and muggy day
gave way to warm rain

solstice summer

in slow footsteps comes
the darkness after sunset,
cool night trails behind.

solstice summer
the sun stood still, then moved on.
solstice summer

Where's the Horse?

Q: I can observe anger and work with greed, but how does one observe delusion?

A: You're riding a horse and asking "Where's the horse?" Pay attention.

-Ajahn Chah

In this quote by the Buddhist monk Ajahn Chah, the horse refers to the fettered mind, full of delusion.

For the purpose of meditation is to relieve the mind of spiritual delusion, leaving it unfettered.

Thus, the question - "How does one observe delusion?" - shows inattention.

Like a rider on a horse,
I ride in control of my mind.
I rise above anger, greed, and delusion
with attentive concentration.

Like a rider on a horse,
I ride in control of my mind.
Free of fetters, the mind cares
for the body to become as one.

Like a rider on a horse,
I ride in control of my mind.
In taking care of the body,
the mind discovers unconditional love.

I must not fear...

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little death
that brings obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass
over me and through me.
And when it has gone past
I will turn the inner eye
to see its path.
Where the fear has gone
there will be nothing.
Only I will remain. — Frank Herbert, Dune

Finding Happiness and Self-actualization

Happy is the fool who laughs
when life's journey is full of joy,
cries when the journey is trying,
and is equanimous when all is peaceful!

Thanks to God!

Thank You for this moment,
in between heartbeats,
on this warm and muggy night.
Thank You for Your embrace,
shared vicariously
by all life, great and small.
Thank You, thank You, thank You.
I'm home safely because of You.
I wake up alive because of You.
This creation of Yours thanks the Creator.

The Goddess Prayer

You are my power,
You are my Light,
the Goddess who is Love
unconditional.
Thus do I propitiate You.
As I believe in You,
so too do You believe in me.
You complete me, and I, You.
We are as one, complete.

Psychiatric Abuse

It is quite possible that in the late 1970s, specific children were targetted by school psychologists and psychiatrists in BC, labelled, and abused in makeshift laboratories.

As well, there may have been collaboration with social workers to traumatize families and break them up to make these children wards of the State.

Some of these children went on to suffer addictions and if girls, succumbed to prostitution.

This is no conspiracy, for I have found two people who report tales of abuse by people in authority.

Of strings, Absolute Oneness and Indra's Web: Life, the Universe and Everything

Of strings, Oneness and Indra's web, there is an interconnectedness betweeen all sentient beings and all of creation itself.

For the Creator and the created are one.

Indeed, infinite consciousness includes both itself and life, the universe and everything.

All Honour the Goddess

In our hearts is the motherlove,
the essence of the Goddess,
while in the heavens above
arises the highest of high, God.
Thus I have no parents.
Heaven and earth are my parents:
the earth is my holy Mother,
and heaven, my holy Father.
Just as earth is as near as my feet,
so too is the Goddess to my heart.
In reverencing Her, God is respected.
Hence, the Queen of Heaven,
the essence of the Holy Spirit.
This heart is Her heart.
Her love embraces all in her grasp.
All honour the Goddess,
the essence of unconditional love.

Eye of Goat

Beware of people
whose eyes are like goats,
for the evil within
them is sizing up a new victim,
and that victim is you.

Avoid Old Goat Eyes!
Run from those eyes.
Run, run, run!
But when cornered,
never hide your fear,
but show it sincerely.

20 Signs of Psychopathic Behavior

Hare's PCL-R 20-item checklist is based on Cleckley's 16-item checklist, and the following is a discussion of the concepts in the PCL-R:
1. GLIB and SUPERFICIAL CHARM -- the tendency to be smooth, engaging, charming, slick, and verbally facile. Psychopathic charm is not in the least shy, self-conscious, or afraid to say anything. A psychopath never gets tongue-tied. They have freed themselves from the social conventions about taking turns in talking, for example.

2. GRANDIOSE SELF-WORTH -- a grossly inflated view of one's abilities and self-worth, self-assured, opinionated, cocky, a braggart. Psychopaths are arrogant people who believe they are superior human beings.

3. NEED FOR STIMULATION or PRONENESS TO BOREDOM -- an excessive need for novel, thrilling, and exciting stimulation; taking chances and doing things that are risky. Psychopaths often have a low self- discipline in carrying tasks through to completion because they get bored easily. They fail to work at the same job for any length of time, for example, or to finish tasks that they consider dull or routine.

4. PATHOLOGICAL LYING -- can be moderate or high; in moderate form, they will be shrewd, crafty, cunning, sly, and clever; in extreme form, they will be deceptive, deceitful, underhanded, unscrupulous, manipulative, and dishonest.

5. CONNING AND MANIPULATIVENESS- the use of deceit and deception to cheat, con, or defraud others for personal gain; distinguished from Item #4 in the degree to which exploitation and callous ruthlessness is present, as reflected in a lack of concern for the feelings and suffering of one's victims.

6. LACK OF REMORSE OR GUILT -- a lack of feelings or concern for the losses, pain, and suffering of victims; a tendency to be unconcerned, dispassionate, coldhearted, and unempathic. This item is usually demonstrated by a disdain for one's victims.

7. SHALLOW AFFECT -- emotional poverty or a limited range or depth of feelings; interpersonal coldness in spite of signs of open gregariousness.

8. CALLOUSNESS and LACK OF EMPATHY -- a lack of feelings toward people in general; cold, contemptuous, inconsiderate, and tactless.

9. PARASITIC LIFESTYLE -- an intentional, manipulative, selfish, and exploitative financial dependence on others as reflected in a lack of motivation, low self-discipline, and inability to begin or complete responsibilities.

10. POOR BEHAVIORAL CONTROLS -- expressions of irritability, annoyance, impatience, threats, aggression, and verbal abuse; inadequate control of anger and temper; acting hastily.

11. PROMISCUOUS SEXUAL BEHAVIOR -- a variety of brief, superficial relations, numerous affairs, and an indiscriminate selection of sexual partners; the maintenance of several relationships at the same time; a history of attempts to sexually coerce others into sexual activity or taking great pride at discussing sexual exploits or conquests.

12. EARLY BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS -- a variety of behaviors prior to age 13, including lying, theft, cheating, vandalism, bullying, sexual activity, fire-setting, glue-sniffing, alcohol use, and running away from home.

13. LACK OF REALISTIC, LONG-TERM GOALS -- an inability or persistent failure to develop and execute long-term plans and goals; a nomadic existence, aimless, lacking direction in life.

14. IMPULSIVITY -- the occurrence of behaviors that are unpremeditated and lack reflection or planning; inability to resist temptation, frustrations, and urges; a lack of deliberation without considering the consequences; foolhardy, rash, unpredictable, erratic, and reckless.

15. IRRESPONSIBILITY -- repeated failure to fulfill or honor obligations and commitments; such as not paying bills, defaulting on loans, performing sloppy work, being absent or late to work, failing to honor contractual agreements.

16. FAILURE TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN ACTIONS -- a failure to accept responsibility for one's actions reflected in low conscientiousness, an absence of dutifulness, antagonistic manipulation, denial of responsibility, and an effort to manipulate others through this denial.

17. MANY SHORT-TERM MARITAL RELATIONSHIPS -- a lack of commitment to a long-term relationship reflected in inconsistent, undependable, and unreliable commitments in life, including marital.

18. JUVENILE DELINQUENCY -- behavior problems between the ages of 13- 18; mostly behaviors that are crimes or clearly involve aspects of antagonism, exploitation, aggression, manipulation, or a callous, ruthless tough-mindedness.

19. REVOCATION OF CONDITION RELEASE -- a revocation of probation or other conditional release due to technical violations, such as carelessness, low deliberation, or failing to appear.

20. CRIMINAL VERSATILITY -- a diversity of types of criminal offenses, regardless if the person has been arrested or convicted for them; taking great pride at getting away with crimes.

Anxiety and Fear In Relationships

IMHO anxiety and fear in relationships is understandable.

However, it is based on ignorance about the other person, not on a verifiable fear of that person due to something he said.

Such anxiety is indicative of a neurosis, the cure of which is simple as communicating with the person being feared.

Thus, to resolve such fear, the simplest step is to open a line of communication.

It is when we do not, that the communication by the other person appears to be harassment or abuse.

It leads me to think that the fearful and anxious person is a coward, and lacks the courage to articulate her fear.

I expect better of her.

Yet, why do I have to initiate the next level of communication? Is it up to me to do so? And might it not be seen as more harassment?

Thus I am reluctant to do so.

All it takes is one phone call to dispell my delusion about what I see as anxiety and fear about my best friend.

The 8 Signs of Mania

1. Recognize the early warning signs of mania-e.g., insomnia, surges of energy, making lots of plans, grandiose thinking, speeded-up thinking, overcommitment, excessive euphoria, spending too much money, etc. Let friends and family know of these symptoms so that they can also become alerted to the start of a manic episode.
   
   
2. Create a stable lifestyle in which you keep regular sleep hours. Studies show that intervals between manic episodes are considerably longer in those people who live in stable environments. In addition, eat a diet that is high in complex carbohydrates and protein, avoiding foods such as simple sugars that can cause ups and downs. Alcohol and caffeine should also be avoided.
   
   
3. Use planning and scheduling to stay focused and grounded. Make a list of things to do and stick to it.
   
   
4. Try to engage in a daily meditative activity which focuses and calms the mind. If you are too restless for sitting meditation, go for a leisurely walk, taking long, deep breaths along the way.
   
   
5. Refrain from taking on too many projects or becoming over-stimulated. If you feel an excess of energy starting to overtake you, channel it into productive physical activities such as doing the dishes, mopping the floor, cleaning out the basement, weeding a garden, etc.
   
   
6. Psychotherapy and support groups can help you to explore the emotional aspects of the illness, as well as provide support during times of stress.
   
   
7. If you feel that things are getting out of hand, call your doctor or therapist. This is especially true if you start losing sleep, as sleep deprivation is one of the major contributors to mania.
   
   
8. Ask a good friend or family member to track your activity level. Sometimes a manic episode can 'sneak up on you,' and an objective person may be able to spot it before it gets out of hand."

---

Reference:

9 Types of Depressive Disorders: http://www.hbcprotocols.com/9types.html

MAO-A and MAO-B and Serenity

"The catecholamines, epinephrine (the other name is adrenalin), norepinephrine (noradrenalin), and dopamine, are the stress hormones which get your body ready for fight-or-flight emergencies. In normal humans (and other mammals), MAO-A and MAO-B deactivate these hormones so that the body can return to a calm state. When the animal is frightened by a primary or conditioned response stimulus, these hormones are squirted into circulation to increase heartrate, breathing rate, and blood pressure to ready the animal for fighting or running away."

So high levels of MAO are related to a calm effect.

Histaminase (an anti-histamine) leads to sedation, and may be moderated by serotonin level.

Therefore, a blood test testing for MAO and histamine level may indicate a higher level for me than normal.

I am predominately calm - a "cool cucumber" - and feel mostly sedated.

The experience with pseudoephedrine was generally no abreaction due to epinephrine.

All it did was make me feel slightly giddy.

And the reason is the raised levels of MAO and histaminase.

I am a natural tranquilizer.

Love is Like Rain

Just as rain falls on us all equally
so too does unconditional love bless each of us.